He's Scoping You Out for Your Digits, but Not the Ones You'd Expect...

We all do it, whether we like to admit it or not: we rate people.

The difference is that some of us have more creative ways of doing it than others. My friend Dave and his friends have this clever system that he shared with me one night while we were out. 

It doesn't have a name so I'm dubbing it the "Area Code Assessment"

ACA has three categories: 

Face --> scale 0-9

Doable? --> Yes (1), No(0)

Body --> scale 0-9

Worst possible rating: 000 (ouch)

Best possible rating: 919 (ohh heyy!)

Using it in Real Life

So let's say you see a person while you're out and you're using this system. Let's say you think they have a decent face, but you probably wouldn't "do" them, and that they have an OK body. You end give them a 4 for face, 0 for doability, and 5 for body. Your mind made up, you tell your friend "I would say...405?" and your friend can agree or disagree accordingly.

The benefit of this system is that you can have a working dialogue with your friends in loud places using the least number of words. Science nerds and math geeks alike love the language of numbers and truly grasp the beauty of this system. It makes sense that the dudes who made this up are finance people who crunch numbers all day, haha.

Some Real Life Area Codes and How They Could Apply to ACA 

D.C.

Our nation's capital: full of 202's, apparently. That's too bad. I guess you don't have to be a looker to pass a piece of legislation though...

CT

In this state, 203 is the way to be. I guess that's why so many residents commute OUT of their state into...

NEW YORK

Visiting Long Island? You'll find some 516's with distinct accents. You'll just know. 

Going way up north to the state's capital? Better find yourself a 518, but know you're venturing dangerously close into "butterface" territory. If you're in Binghamton and encounter a 607, you must be mighty picky (good face/body and ya still wouldn't tap that?). You do however, have a chance to redeem yourself in Buffalo if you find a 716.

If you're a New York City guy, you're probably always searching for the elusive 917 girl, but you go home with the 212 when you've got the beer goggles on. 

But, if you happen to venture into the suburbs, you'll be searching for a 914 girl to keep you company.

NEW JERSEY

I can proudly say I attended school in northern NJ for 9 years and loved it. But if you're a girl who's an NJ-hater like the rest of the country, you'd DIE before ever thinking of dating a 201 guy. 

So you decide to head to Trenton, and find a 609. Thinking you can "so do better than THAT" you bail on Trenton and go to Elizabeth and find a 908, and you leave him where he is. Why? because he's from Jersey. GIRL, you NEED to get over your Jerseyphobia! Or,  just go back to...

PENNSYLVANIA

...to your Philly-based, cheesesteak-loving 215. That one's for you, AE. ;) haha. (don't worry, he's not ACTUALLY a "215...")

Final Thoughts

Please refrain from incorporating ACA into bad pickup lines i.e. "hey baby you're a _ 1 _, wanna give me the rest of your number? ;)" Just.say.no. 

Also, there is apparently a full 10 digit system in the works, but it's proving to be difficult. Would YOU be able to remember 10 different categories while slightly inebriated? I think not.

And there you have it kids. Use the system wisely and be warned: it's slightly addicting.

      

                 " I've got hoes, in different area codes" - Ludacris' "Area Codes"